They grow up soooo fast. You think you are taking enough pictures and then you realize you forgot to get a picture of the tiny feet they had when they were born. I have to take more pictures. He'll be two next month. We are going to move him into a toddler bed. He won't be a baby anymore. (Can you hear the tears falling?)
I'm not a picture taker. They just get thrown in a box somewhere. Well, in this age of digital cameras they get stuck on a hard drive. Before I know it, my little baby will be going off to college and I won't have enough pictures.
I'm not a picture taker. They just get thrown in a box somewhere. Well, in this age of digital cameras they get stuck on a hard drive. Before I know it, my little baby will be going off to college and I won't have enough pictures.
Posted
by Hedda on Tuesday, June 27, 2006
I'm not supposed to write about my husband on here, but really. He just makes it so easy.
We lost our first son. I try to do things to make special days, Birthdays, Christmas, etc., more special. For Father's Day I found a frame set that included clay. You were supposed to make an imprint of a hand or foot or pet's paw and then put a picture in the other side as a memento. I wanted him to have an imprint of Connor's hand and foot. See, I'm having a hard time with Connor growing up all of a sudden. This is the first time it has bothered me and it has hit me like a ton of bricks.
I bought the kit and took it to my mom's so my hubby wouldn't see with the plan of working on it on Saturday after the Dish guy came to install the upgrade I hadn't gotten from me. (A whole other story. Don't get me started.I waited 6 hours on him.) When I finally got to my mom's I hurriedly started working on it. Connor's big foot and hand wouldn't fit on it. He got dog hair in it. I had to start all over. Blah Blah Blah. Finally, I got it finished and all before K showed up.
Connor gave him the gift the next day. He opened it and said he liked it. Monday night I put a picture in it. As of this morning, it was still waiting to go to work and sit on his desk. There are no pictures of his family at work. He has been there for 3 months. I just IM'ed him and asked if he took the picture today. He said, Connor's pictures are tomorrow.
I swear, Boys are Stupid!
I would like to prove my point more, but I'm not allowed to tell you my other story. Sorry, I would get in trouble. And it's not about my husband.
We lost our first son. I try to do things to make special days, Birthdays, Christmas, etc., more special. For Father's Day I found a frame set that included clay. You were supposed to make an imprint of a hand or foot or pet's paw and then put a picture in the other side as a memento. I wanted him to have an imprint of Connor's hand and foot. See, I'm having a hard time with Connor growing up all of a sudden. This is the first time it has bothered me and it has hit me like a ton of bricks.
I bought the kit and took it to my mom's so my hubby wouldn't see with the plan of working on it on Saturday after the Dish guy came to install the upgrade I hadn't gotten from me. (A whole other story. Don't get me started.I waited 6 hours on him.) When I finally got to my mom's I hurriedly started working on it. Connor's big foot and hand wouldn't fit on it. He got dog hair in it. I had to start all over. Blah Blah Blah. Finally, I got it finished and all before K showed up.
Connor gave him the gift the next day. He opened it and said he liked it. Monday night I put a picture in it. As of this morning, it was still waiting to go to work and sit on his desk. There are no pictures of his family at work. He has been there for 3 months. I just IM'ed him and asked if he took the picture today. He said, Connor's pictures are tomorrow.
I swear, Boys are Stupid!
I would like to prove my point more, but I'm not allowed to tell you my other story. Sorry, I would get in trouble. And it's not about my husband.
Posted
by Hedda on Monday, June 26, 2006
I listen to a radio station that has mostly talk in the morning and takes a lot of phone calls. This week they have been taking calls from teenagers about parties they go to. Apparently at these parties the kids (junior high and older) do sexual things going almost all the way in the presence of their friends. If they want to go all the way, they go into a private place. The main guy on the show was appalled that this was happening. He has a child that is 4 years old. He kept saying that he thought this was not a prevalent thing, but the show has gotten quite a few calls and e-mails saying that they go to these parties all the time.
Most parents would say, "Not my kid." I think that's what my parents thought about my brothers and me. I never would have gone to a party like that, but I wasn't a perfect angel. So the question arises, how do you raise your children so that they do not do things like going to these parties? If you are totally strict, eventually they will go wild. If you are not involved you run the risk of them running wild. Do you make sure they always party at your house?
It scares me to think that I have a child and it is my job to raise him to be an adult. What if I screw it all up? What if I miss all the signs that he is out drinking, doing drugs and having sex? Does that mean I'm a bad parent? What if I raise him the best way I know how and he still turns from me?
How do you raise kids to make the right choice when you are not there to tell them what to do?
Most parents would say, "Not my kid." I think that's what my parents thought about my brothers and me. I never would have gone to a party like that, but I wasn't a perfect angel. So the question arises, how do you raise your children so that they do not do things like going to these parties? If you are totally strict, eventually they will go wild. If you are not involved you run the risk of them running wild. Do you make sure they always party at your house?
It scares me to think that I have a child and it is my job to raise him to be an adult. What if I screw it all up? What if I miss all the signs that he is out drinking, doing drugs and having sex? Does that mean I'm a bad parent? What if I raise him the best way I know how and he still turns from me?
How do you raise kids to make the right choice when you are not there to tell them what to do?
Posted
by Hedda on Friday, June 23, 2006
Connor is ready to be potty trained. He knows when his diaper is wet or dirty. He can get his diapers out of the cabinet. He knows where the wipes are. It's definitely time. And I am sooooo tired of changing diapers.
I have a short book that teaches how to potty train in 3 days. 3 DAYS!!! Holy cow! That's fast. Dr. Phil says you can do it in 1 day. (I think. It's really fast, though.) We bought Connor a potty. Just for him. We tried to get him to sit on it and he would scream. Bloody murder. We would try to sit him on the big potty and he would scream. Bloody murder. Hmmm. This is not going well.
I asked Em if she had any ideas. She said to make a really big deal out of Connor having his own potty. We did. I felt like a total idiot. Still do. He sat on it!! Fully clothed, but he sat on it.
Sunday, I was able to get him to sit on it with no clothes on before he went to bed. Another big step I think. He still hasn't pottied in it, but we are getting there. I'm not pushing it because the daycare won't start potty training until he is two and that isn't until the end of July.
Last night I got him to sit on the potty several times. Again he was naked. We were getting ready for bed. He pointed at his wee wee and said potty. He never did. We went back to his room to get dressed. Do you know how hard it is to get an almost 2 year old to get ready for bed? I finally got him to come over and stand in front of me when.....Plop...Plop. That's right!!!! HE CRAPPED ON THE CARPET!!!! If we had stayed on the potty a few seconds longer we would have had our first success.
The joys of motherhood.
Then to top that off, right before I put him to bed, for the first time without coaching he told me he loved me. He said, " I puv chew!" and gave me a big hug. Yeah. I cried liked a big loser again.
I have a short book that teaches how to potty train in 3 days. 3 DAYS!!! Holy cow! That's fast. Dr. Phil says you can do it in 1 day. (I think. It's really fast, though.) We bought Connor a potty. Just for him. We tried to get him to sit on it and he would scream. Bloody murder. We would try to sit him on the big potty and he would scream. Bloody murder. Hmmm. This is not going well.
I asked Em if she had any ideas. She said to make a really big deal out of Connor having his own potty. We did. I felt like a total idiot. Still do. He sat on it!! Fully clothed, but he sat on it.
Sunday, I was able to get him to sit on it with no clothes on before he went to bed. Another big step I think. He still hasn't pottied in it, but we are getting there. I'm not pushing it because the daycare won't start potty training until he is two and that isn't until the end of July.
Last night I got him to sit on the potty several times. Again he was naked. We were getting ready for bed. He pointed at his wee wee and said potty. He never did. We went back to his room to get dressed. Do you know how hard it is to get an almost 2 year old to get ready for bed? I finally got him to come over and stand in front of me when.....Plop...Plop. That's right!!!! HE CRAPPED ON THE CARPET!!!! If we had stayed on the potty a few seconds longer we would have had our first success.
The joys of motherhood.
Then to top that off, right before I put him to bed, for the first time without coaching he told me he loved me. He said, " I puv chew!" and gave me a big hug. Yeah. I cried liked a big loser again.
Posted
by Hedda on Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Last night Ken, Connor, my nephew, Stephen, and I went to dinner at Outback. (Damn diet!) I have begun to notice that there are a lot of pregnant women out lately. I wonder if the warm weather brings them out. Weird. I wanted to be inside when it was 4 billion degrees and 4 thousand percent humidity. Anyway, I noticed a lady at a table near us that looked pregnant. I was just about to mention my observation to Ken when I noticed she had a hospital band on. I wondered if maybe she was going in for some sort of shots or something like that. Then I noticed her husband had a hospital band on too. There was no baby with them. Uh oh. I know what that means. They more than likely have a baby in the NICU.
Ken and I discussed it back and forth. What if I was wrong. Maybe I should go over and say something. I want to be some sort of support. I don't want to interrupt their dinner though. That would be rude. They were with one set of grandparents. Maybe they had just lost the baby. I had been there and it didn't look like it. Crap, I should do something. Connor was with us and I didn't want to throw that in their faces. Seeing other children can be hard. I know that.
The more we watched them the more we saw the signs. You know, that NICU stare. We are here, but we're really exhausted. We want to be at the hospital and we've been on this roller coaster that just won't end. It was all there. Their salads arrived and I really didn't want to interrupt them then. But, this was it. This is what I want to do. This is my calling. Help families in the NICU. It's not my personality to just get up in a restaurant and go talk to someone I know. What do I do? Maybe I have one of my old business cards. Nope. I should go over. Crap. I just can't.
I had an old business card. I corrected the email address on it and wrote on the back "NICU mom of a 29w2dayer. Call of email if you need to talk or would like support." That was it. I would just tell them I saw the bands and thought they had a child in the NICU and wanted to give them my card. No. That would be intruding again.
Their waiter brought us our food. PERFECT!!!!! He asked if he could do anything else. I asked if he would give the card to the young couple at the table. He was their waiter. He had every reason to go over. He said it would be no problem. What a relief. He gave it to them and I saw that they passed it around the table.
Ken mentioned that he felt like he was being watched while he ate. I agreed. Then I started to second guess myself. What if I was wrong. What if they don't have a baby in the NICU? What if it was something very simple? I would feel like a total idiot. Oh well. At least I had tried.
This is where I had intended to end my post, but as we were leaving the woman stopped me. She thanked me for the card. I told her I had noticed their bands. Her baby had been born at 33 weeks. She had been having problem with the placenta and her blood pressure and the baby had plateaued in growth so the doctors had gone ahead and taken the baby. He weighed 3 pounds 4 ounces. She said he had done fine the first few days, but then he got wimpy white boy syndrome and had to be put on a ventilator. He had come off of it and they had held him Saturday, but they got a call at 2 that morning telling them they were putting him back on. She said it had been a roller coaster. We talked for a few minutes and I told her that I understood. If she needed anyone to talk to that she could call or email anytime.
We went outside and Ken asked if I was all tingly inside. I just smiled really big. I was right. I WAS RIGHT!!! I wanted to call Queen and tell her, but she was at a wedding. I called Mom and told her. Ken said I looked like I had just asked out the hot guy and he had said yes. That's when I realized I had it. Funny. Something I never wanted. I have NICUdar.
Ken and I discussed it back and forth. What if I was wrong. Maybe I should go over and say something. I want to be some sort of support. I don't want to interrupt their dinner though. That would be rude. They were with one set of grandparents. Maybe they had just lost the baby. I had been there and it didn't look like it. Crap, I should do something. Connor was with us and I didn't want to throw that in their faces. Seeing other children can be hard. I know that.
The more we watched them the more we saw the signs. You know, that NICU stare. We are here, but we're really exhausted. We want to be at the hospital and we've been on this roller coaster that just won't end. It was all there. Their salads arrived and I really didn't want to interrupt them then. But, this was it. This is what I want to do. This is my calling. Help families in the NICU. It's not my personality to just get up in a restaurant and go talk to someone I know. What do I do? Maybe I have one of my old business cards. Nope. I should go over. Crap. I just can't.
I had an old business card. I corrected the email address on it and wrote on the back "NICU mom of a 29w2dayer. Call of email if you need to talk or would like support." That was it. I would just tell them I saw the bands and thought they had a child in the NICU and wanted to give them my card. No. That would be intruding again.
Their waiter brought us our food. PERFECT!!!!! He asked if he could do anything else. I asked if he would give the card to the young couple at the table. He was their waiter. He had every reason to go over. He said it would be no problem. What a relief. He gave it to them and I saw that they passed it around the table.
Ken mentioned that he felt like he was being watched while he ate. I agreed. Then I started to second guess myself. What if I was wrong. What if they don't have a baby in the NICU? What if it was something very simple? I would feel like a total idiot. Oh well. At least I had tried.
This is where I had intended to end my post, but as we were leaving the woman stopped me. She thanked me for the card. I told her I had noticed their bands. Her baby had been born at 33 weeks. She had been having problem with the placenta and her blood pressure and the baby had plateaued in growth so the doctors had gone ahead and taken the baby. He weighed 3 pounds 4 ounces. She said he had done fine the first few days, but then he got wimpy white boy syndrome and had to be put on a ventilator. He had come off of it and they had held him Saturday, but they got a call at 2 that morning telling them they were putting him back on. She said it had been a roller coaster. We talked for a few minutes and I told her that I understood. If she needed anyone to talk to that she could call or email anytime.
We went outside and Ken asked if I was all tingly inside. I just smiled really big. I was right. I WAS RIGHT!!! I wanted to call Queen and tell her, but she was at a wedding. I called Mom and told her. Ken said I looked like I had just asked out the hot guy and he had said yes. That's when I realized I had it. Funny. Something I never wanted. I have NICUdar.
Posted
by Hedda on Monday, June 19, 2006
As anyone could imagine, since Queen lost her son she has been surfing the net. She has been reading blog after blog about pregnancy and infant death. She is a link clicker. She has showed me many resources that I wish I had had when Garrett passed away.
For about a year I have wanted to find some way to break into the hospital(s) in the area and be some sort of support to the families in the NICU. The medical staff is great, but they haven't all been through what the family is going through and they have a job to do. Sometimes it is good to just have someone there who can put things into laymen's terms or empathize with you. I never had that.
Queen showed me The Tiny Miracles Foundation site. I thought I was going to pass out. That's what I want to do. How did they do that? I have to know. So, today I am writing a letter to those ladies to ask how they did it. Queen and I have decided we are going to start Atlanta Preemie (working name, I don't like it) in the Metro Atlanta area. You all need to know that I will be hitting you up for money. That's what non-profits do. This should be really exciting.
Hold on all you preemie parents! Help is on the way!
For about a year I have wanted to find some way to break into the hospital(s) in the area and be some sort of support to the families in the NICU. The medical staff is great, but they haven't all been through what the family is going through and they have a job to do. Sometimes it is good to just have someone there who can put things into laymen's terms or empathize with you. I never had that.
Queen showed me The Tiny Miracles Foundation site. I thought I was going to pass out. That's what I want to do. How did they do that? I have to know. So, today I am writing a letter to those ladies to ask how they did it. Queen and I have decided we are going to start Atlanta Preemie (working name, I don't like it) in the Metro Atlanta area. You all need to know that I will be hitting you up for money. That's what non-profits do. This should be really exciting.
Hold on all you preemie parents! Help is on the way!
Posted
by Hedda on Friday, June 16, 2006
That's how I feel right now. I'm sleeping better. At least I didn't wake up until 4 last night and then I went right back to sleep.
I can't decide if I should put the baby, OK he's not a baby anymore, in a toddler bed or a twin bed. Someone told me to put him on a mattress on the floor. Guess who that was. He's getting sooooo big and it makes me sad. Then I can't decide what kind of bedding to get. The drama of my life. Dun Dun Dun.
I really don't have a lot to say today. Iwill try and do better tomorrow.
Sorry.
I can't decide if I should put the baby, OK he's not a baby anymore, in a toddler bed or a twin bed. Someone told me to put him on a mattress on the floor. Guess who that was. He's getting sooooo big and it makes me sad. Then I can't decide what kind of bedding to get. The drama of my life. Dun Dun Dun.
I really don't have a lot to say today. Iwill try and do better tomorrow.
Sorry.
Posted
by Hedda on Wednesday, June 14, 2006
I hate this kind of stuff. HATE IT!!! But she's my best friend (you too, Em) and she recently lost her son and she's high risk at 21 weeks, so she gets whatever she wants. Oh, make me puke.
Here are 10 things about me that start with the letter M. Queen picked the letter. I didn't.
1. Music-I once was a Music Ed. major. It is my dream to go back and finish. I would love to teach High school band.
2. Mushy-Not the kind you are thinking. After two babies my body looks all mushy.
3. Monkey-My son is an absolute monkey. Can't you tell from the picture to the Urgent Care Center for 4 staples?
4. Money-Why am I not independently wealthy?
5. Mom-to one wonderful child and a dearly missed angel.
6. Maryland-the first state I lived in after we got married. I really miss it sometimes.
7. Magnesium Sulfate-spent 48 hours on that med to stop labor at 28 weeks 5 days with our first son. It worked for 5 days.
8. Movies-We used to see movies at the theater all the time. Then we lost Garrett. I don't know why we don't go anymore. I love the popcorn there.
9. McGraw-As in Tim. He is HOT!!!!
10. Massachusetts-The state Garrett was born in. We were on vacation. My husband is from there. I always wanted to live there. Not anymore.
I'm glad that's over. If you want to play, leave me a comment and I'll pick a letter for you. Except you Em. You've been tagged. You're letter is C-for Camille.
Here are 10 things about me that start with the letter M. Queen picked the letter. I didn't.
1. Music-I once was a Music Ed. major. It is my dream to go back and finish. I would love to teach High school band.
2. Mushy-Not the kind you are thinking. After two babies my body looks all mushy.
3. Monkey-My son is an absolute monkey. Can't you tell from the picture to the Urgent Care Center for 4 staples?
4. Money-Why am I not independently wealthy?
5. Mom-to one wonderful child and a dearly missed angel.
6. Maryland-the first state I lived in after we got married. I really miss it sometimes.
7. Magnesium Sulfate-spent 48 hours on that med to stop labor at 28 weeks 5 days with our first son. It worked for 5 days.
8. Movies-We used to see movies at the theater all the time. Then we lost Garrett. I don't know why we don't go anymore. I love the popcorn there.
9. McGraw-As in Tim. He is HOT!!!!
10. Massachusetts-The state Garrett was born in. We were on vacation. My husband is from there. I always wanted to live there. Not anymore.
I'm glad that's over. If you want to play, leave me a comment and I'll pick a letter for you. Except you Em. You've been tagged. You're letter is C-for Camille.